I grew up on radio, not TV.

I've always been very self-motivated.

When I die, sprinkle my ashes over the 80's.

The only thing I'm allergic to is criticism.

Nobody's going to get a hot dog at my concert!

An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance

The world's a stage, and I want the brightest spot.

Remember, life is just a game and no one gets out alive

He who knows how will always work for he who knows why.

I used to have a drug problem, now I make enough money.

Radio as we know it is pretty much changing completely.

The problem with self-improvement is knowing when to quit.

You've got to roll with the punches to get to what's real.

A lot of rock bands are truly a legend in their own minds.

I'm not conceited. Conceit is a fault and I have no faults.

I used to have a drug problem, but now I have enough money.

The most important part of any rock song is the guitar solo.

Give me a glazed doughnut, and a bottle of anything... to go!

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

The Breakfast of Champions isn't cereal, it's the competition!

Rap is poetry to music, like beatniks without beards and bongos.

Let's play with the career, if we can't find anything else to do

I'm a family man. I personally started 3 or 4 families last year.

It dont matter WHAT your doin, ust as long as you LOOK GOOD doin it

Critics like Elvis Costello because critics are like Elvis Costello.

It doesn't get better, it doesn't get worse, but it sure gets different!

Van Halen can keep providing the rain and I'll keep providing the parade.

I'm a family oriented guy; I've personally started four or five this year.

I don't get all the women that I want... I get all the women that want me.

The only people who put iced tea in Jack Daniel's bottles is the Clash baby!

Self-tragedy is always a great way to dramatize yourself - ask any teenager.

It's not who wants to sleep with you; It's who wants to sleep with you again.

The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the front of an oncoming train.

I live and breathe and do four times as much four times as fast as anyone else.

Stick your head above the crowd and eventually somebody will throw a rock at it.

Rock & roll is not so much a question of electric guitars as it is striped pants.

I think the two most difficult things to deal with in life are failure and success

Audience participation should extend from on-stage to backstage to under the stage

Music videos are like girlfriends. I'm constantly amazed on what other people doing

Music journalists love Elvis Costello and hate me because they look like Elvis Costello

I can teach you to jump up in five seconds-it takes years to learn how to land properly.

I change as the times change. I'm a reflection of what's around me without trying at all.

When you can spell subpoena without thinking about it, that's when you know you've made it.

Music is like girlfriends to me; I'm continually astonished by the choices other people make.

People ask me how far I've come. And I tell them twelve feet: from the audience to the stage.

If you put a Van Halen album in your record collection, it will melt all the rest of your records.

Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.

Whether I'm on for a day or whether I'm on for a year, at the end of the day, I sing for my dinner.

You know what rock musicians are? They are hung up, neurotic, over-weight hippies with sex problems.

On parties it's not about who you are. The real reason to which a party revolves is how good you look.

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