Quotes by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross - Page 3 | QuoteForever

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Those who have the strength and the love to sit with a dying patient in the silence that goes beyond words will know that this moment is neither frightening nor painful, but a peaceful cessation of the functioning of the body.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Love
Strength
Body
Dying
Frightening
Painful
Patient
Silence
Words
Beyond
Cessation
Goes
Moment
Neither
Nor
Sit
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We run after values that, at death, become zero. At the end of your life, nobody asks you how many degrees you have, or how many mansions you built, or how many Rolls Royces you could afford. That's what dying patients teach you.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Running
Zero
Dying
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Death is the final stage of growth in this life. There is no total death. Only the body dies. The self or the spirit, or whatever you may wish to label it, is eternal. You may interpret this in any way that makes you comfortable.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Growth
Self
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It is inconceivable for our unconscious to imagine an actual ending of our own life here on Earth, and if this life of ours has to end, the ending is always attributed to a malicious intervention from the outside by someone else.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Intervention
Malicious
Unconscious
Actual
Attributed
Ending
Inconceivable
Ours
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I was educated in line with the basic premise: work work work. You are only a valuable human being if you work. This is utterly wrong. Half working, half dancing - that is the right mixture. I myself have danced and played too little.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Dancing
Half
Mixtures
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We need to teach the next generation of children from day one that they are responsible for their lives. Mankind's greatest gift, also its greatest curse, is that we have free choice. We can make our choices built from love or from fear.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Inspirational
Love
Children
Curse
Free Choice
Mankind
Next
Next Generation
Responsible
Teach
Free
Greatest
Choice
Day One
Gift
Generation
Greatest Gift
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It is my conviction that it is the intuitive, spiritual aspects of us humans-the inner voice-that gives us the 'knowing,' the peace, and the direction to go through the windstorms of life, not shattered but whole, joining in love and understanding.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Knowing
Spiritual
Voice
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We are living in a time of uncertainty, anxiety, fear, and despair. It is essential that you become aware of the light, power, and strength within each of you, and that you learn to use those inner resources in service of your own and others' growth.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Anxiety
Growth
Light
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Dying is an integral part of life, as natural and predictable as being born. But whereas birth is cause for celebration, death has become a dreaded and unspeakable issue to be avoided by every means possible in our modern society. Perhaps it is that.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Dying
Issues
Mean
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I say to people who care for people who are dying, if you really love that person and want to help them, be with them when their end comes close. Sit with them - you don't even have to talk. You don't have to do anything but really be there with them.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Sympathy
Dying
People
Who Cares
Love People Care
Close
Sit
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If, on the other hand, you listen to your own inner voice, to your own inner wisdom, which is far greater than anyone else's as far as you are concerned, you will not go wrong, and you will know what to do with your life. Then time is no longer relevant.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Hands
Relevant
Voice
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There is no joy without hardship. If not for death, would we appreciate life? If not for hate, would we know the ultimate goal is love? At these moments you can either hold on to negativity and look for blame, or you can choose to heal and keep on loving.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Appreciate
Hate
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As far as service goes, it can take the form of a million things. To do service, you don't have to be a doctor working in the slums for free, or become a social worker. Your position in life and what you do doesn't matter as much as how you do what you do.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Doctors
Form
Matter
Position
Slums
Social
Life Doctor Your
Free
As Far As
Worker
Doctor
Far
Goes
Million
Service
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Real love doesn't die. It's the physical body that dies. Genuine, authentic love has no expectations whatsoever; it doesn't even need the physical presence of a person. ... Even when he is dead and buried that part of you that loves the person will always live.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Expectations
Needs
Real
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Mourning can go on for years and years. It doesn't end after a year, that's a false fantasy. It usually ends when people realize that they can live again, that they can concentrate their energies on their lives as a whole, and not on their hurt, and guilt and pain.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Grieving
Hurt
Pain
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When we grow older and begin to realize that our omnipotence is really not so omnipotent, that our strongest wishes are not powerful enough to make the impossible possible, the fear that we have contributed to the death of a loved one diminishes - and with it, the guilt.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Guilt
Impossible
Omnipotence
Strongest
Begin
Diminishes
Loved One
Wishes
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Consciously or not, we are all on a quest for answers, trying to learn the lessons of life. We grapple with fear and guilt. We search for meaning, love, and power. We try to understand fear, loss, and time. We seek to discover who we are and how we can become truly happy.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Answers
Guilt
Lessons
Life Lesson
Loss
Life Love Time
Understand
Discover
Seek
Meaning
Quest
Search
Truly
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It is not the end of the physical body that should worry us. Rather, our concern must be to live while we're alive - to release our inner selves from the spiritual death that comes with living behind a facade designed to conform to external definitions of who and what we are.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Alive
Body
Concern
Conform
Definitions
Facade
Physical Body
Release
Self
Spiritual
Worry
Living
Behind
External
Designed
Inner
Physical
Rather
Selves
While
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The world cannot be discovered by a journey of miles...only by a spiritual journey...by which we arrive at the ground at our feet, and learn to be at home. The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Journey
Unconditional Love
Home
Spiritual
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I was destined to work with dying patients. I had no choice when I encountered my first AIDS patient. I felt called to travel some 250,000 miles each year to hold workshops that helped people cope with the most painful aspects of life, death and the transition between the two.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Travel
Aids
Destined
Dying
Felt
Miles
Painful
Patient
Transition
Workshops
Life Death Work
Aspects
Year
Choice
Cope
Each Year
Encountered
Life Work Death
Hold
Helped
No Choice
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Lots of my dying patients say they grow in bounds and leaps, and finish all the unfinished business. But assisting a suicide is cheating them of these lessons, like taking a student out of school before final exams. That's not love, it's projecting your own unfinished business
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Cheating
School
Suicide
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It is important to feel the anger without judging it, without attempting to find meaning in it. It may take many forms: anger at the health-care system, at life, at your loved one for leaving. Life is unfair. Death is unfair. Anger is a natural reaction to the unfairness of loss.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Anger
Death
Attempting
Judging
Leaving
Loss
Natural
Unfair
Life Death Your
Forms
Loved
Loved One
Meaning
Reaction
System
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How do geese know when to fly to the sun? Who tells them the seasons? How do we, humans know when it is time to move on? As with the migrant birds, so surely with us, there is a voice within if only we would listen to it, that tells us certainly when to go forth into the unknown.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Moving On
Women
Voice
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We're put here on Earth to learn our own lessons. No one can tell you what your lessons are; it is part of your personal journey to discover them. On these journeys we may be given a lot, or just a little bit, of the things we must grapple with, but never more than we can handle.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Journey
Earth
Given
Handle
Lessons
Little Bit
May
Little
Lot
Bit
Own
Them
Part
Here
Discover
Must
Just A Little Bit
Learn
Put
Personal
Tell
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My work with AIDS patients started right at the beginning of the epidemic, totally unplanned and spontaneous, as all my work had proceeded in the previous two decades, if it were not already my whole life-style! In the early eighties, we knew very little about this peculiar disease.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Aids
Decades
Disease
Spontaneous
Totally
All My Work
Beginning
Eighties
Epidemic
Patients
Previous
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The five stages - denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance - are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Anger
Learning
Acceptance
Bargaining
Denial
Feelings
Five
Grief
Linear
Lost
May
Tools
Part
Feeling
Frame
Help
Identify
Makes
Stops
Some
Stages
Timeline
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According to my parents, I was supposed to have been a nice, churchgoing Swiss housewife. Instead I ended up an opinionated psychiatrist, author and lecturer in the American Southwest, who communicates with spirits from a world that I believe is far more loving and glorious than our own.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Glorious
Housewife
Lecturer
Nice
Opinionated
Psychiatrist
Swiss
Believe World I Believe
According
Author
Believe I Believe World
Ended
Instead
Loving
Southwest
Supposed
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Learning lessons is a little like reaching maturity. You're not suddenly more happy, wealthy, or powerful, but you understand the world around you better, and you're at peace with yourself. Learning life's lessons is not about making your life perfect, but about seeing life as it was meant to be.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Happy
Learning
Lessons
Maturity
Meant To Be
Perfect
Powerful
Reaching
Seeing
Wealthy
World
Little
Yourself
Life Peace World
More
Understand
Around
Meant
Making
Suddenly
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Medicine has changed greatly in the last decades. Widespread vaccinations have practically eradicated many illnesses, at least in western Europe and the United States. The use of chemotherapy, especially the antibiotics, has contributed to an ever decreasing number of fatalities in infectious diseases.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Antibiotics
Changed
Chemotherapy
Decades
Europe
Medicine
United States
Western
Western Europe
Decreasing
Diseases
Eradicated
Number
Greatly
Practically
Illnesses
Infectious
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Those who have been immersed in the tragedy of massive death during wartime, and who have faced it squarely, never allowing their senses and feelings to become numbed and indifferent, have emerged from their experiences with growth and humanness greater than that achieved through almost any other means.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
War
Mean
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The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not "get over" the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Change
Learning
Smile
Grief
Losing A Loved One
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For years, I have been stalked by a bad reputation. Actually, I have been pursued by people who have regarded me as the 'Death and Dying' Lady. They believe that having spent more than three decades in research into death and life after death qualifies me as an expert on the subject. I think they miss the point.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Decades
Dying
Pursued
Reputation
Research
Life Death Believe
Miss
Expert
Lady
Regarded
Spent
Subject
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There are dreams of love, life, and adventure in all of us. But we are also sadly filled with reasons why we shouldn't try. These reasons seem to protect us, but in truth they imprison us. They hold life at a distance. Life will be over sooner than we think. If we have bikes to ride and people to love, now is the time.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Dream
Distance
Love Life
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We will never be enlightened unless we realize and own what our capacity, from the best of the best to the worst of the worst because then we have more empathy, more compassion, more sympathy for others who do things that are hurtful and harmful and we see, given certain situations, I'm capable of that myself. So, I'm less judgmental.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Peace
Compassion
Empathy
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When I came to this country in 1958, to be a dying patient in a medical hospital was a nightmare. You were put in the last room, furthest away from the nurses' station. You were full of pain, but they wouldn't give you morphine. Nobody told you that you were full of cancer and that it was understandable that you had pain and needed medication.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Medical
Cancer
Dying
Medication
Morphine
Needed
Nightmare
Pain
Patient
Furthest
Hospital
Nurses
Station
Understandable
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The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Break Up
Happiness
Inspirational
Life
Your Beautiful
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Grief is not just a series of events, stages, or timelines. Our society places enormous pressure on us to get over loss, to get through grief. But how long do you grieve for a husband of fifty years, a teenager killed in a car accident, a four-year-old child: a year? Five years? Forever? The loss happens in time, in fact in a moment, but its aftermath lasts a lifetime.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Children
Husband
Teenager
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What is important is to realize that whether we understand fully who we are or what will happen when we die, it's our purpose to grow as human beings, to look within ourselves, to find and build upon that source of peace and understanding and strength that is our individual self. And then to reach out to others with love and acceptance and patient guidance in the hope of what we may become together.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Acceptance
Self
Understanding
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You have to temper the iron. Every hardship is an opportunity that you are given, an opportunity to grow. To grow is the sole purpose of existence on this planet Earth. You will not grow if you sit in a beautiful flower garden, but you will grow if you are sick, if you are in pain, if you experience losses, and if you do not put your head in the sand, but take the pain as a gift to you with a very, very specific purpose.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Beautiful
Pain
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And after your death, when most of you for the first time realize what life here is all about, you will begin to see that your life here is almost nothing but the sum total of every choice you have made during every moment of your life. Your thoughts, which you are responsible for, are as real as your deeds. You will begin to realize that every word and every deed affects your life and has also touched thousands of lives.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Choices
Deeds
Real
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Grief is real because loss is real. Each grief has its own imprint, as distinctive and as unique as the person we lost. The pain of loss is so intense, so heartbreaking, because in loving we deeply connect with another human being, and grief is the reflection of the connection that has been lost. We think we want to avoid the grief, but really it is the pain of the loss we want to avoid. Grief is the healing process that ultimately brings us comfort in our pain.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Grief
Pain
Real
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It is very important that you only do what you love to do. you may be poor, you may go hungry, you may lose your car, you may have to move into a shabby place to live, but you will totally live. And at the end of your days you will bless your life because you have done what you came here to do. Otherwise, you will live your life as a prostitute, you will do things only for a reason, to please other people, and you will never have lived. and you will not have a pleasant death.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Death
Car
Moving
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Whether you know it or not, one of the most important relationships in your life is with your Soul. Will you be kind and loving to your Soul, or will you be harsh and difficult? Many of us unknowingly damage our Souls with our negative attitudes and actions or by simple neglect. By making the relationship with your Soul an important part of your life, however, by honoring it in your daily routine, you give your life greater meaning and substance. Use your experiences-all of them-as opportunities to nourish your Soul!
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Opportunity
Attitude
Important Relationships
Simple
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There are only two emotions: love and fear. All positive emotions come from love, all negative emotions from fear. From love flows happiness, contentment, peace, and joy. From fear comes anger, hate, anxiety and guilt. It's true that there are only two primary emotions, love and fear. But it's more accurate to say that there is only love or fear, for we cannot feel these two emotions together, at exactly the same time. They're opposites. If we're in fear, we are not in a place of love. When we're in a place of love, we cannot be in a place of fear.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Fear
Hate
Opposites
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We are all so bent and determined to get what we want, we miss the lessons that could be learned from life's experiences. Many of my AIDS patients discovered that the last year of their lives was by far their best. Many have said they wouldn't have traded the rich quality of that last year of life for a healthier body. Sadly, it is only when tragedy strikes that most of us begin attending to the deeper aspects of life. It is only then that we attempt to go beyond surface concerns-what we look like, how much money we make, and so forth-to discover what's really important.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Missing
Perspective
Years
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In the so-called civilized world, children are physically, sexually and/or emotionally abused; they are the leaders of our future. When children are raised in such a hostile and violent environment, how can we hope for a harmonious future for all people of this world? In this light, the purpose of human life is to achieve our own spiritual evolution, to get rid of negativity, to establish harmony among our physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual quadrants, to learn to live in harmony within the family, community, nation, ..treating all of mankind as brothers and sisters.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross / Psychiatrist
Brother
Children
Spiritual
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