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Terry Pratchett Quotes - Page 12
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I’m not superstitious. I’m a witch. Witches aren’t superstitious. We are what people are superstitious of.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
People
Superstitious
Witch
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In order to have a change of fortune at the last minute, you have to take your fortune to the last minute.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Lasts
Minutes
Order
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Raising the flag and singing the anthem are, while somewhat suspicious, not in themselves acts of treason.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Anthem
Flags
Singing
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I can't be talking to a tree. If I was talking to a tree I'd be mad, and I'm not mad, so trees can't talk.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Sane
Talking
Tree
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Give anyone a lever long enough and they can change the world. It's unreliable levers that are the problem.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Giving
Long
World
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Destiny is important, see, but people go wrong when they think it controls them. It's the other way around.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Destiny
People
Thinking
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Sometimes you can think that 'I've had enough of wizards!' And sometimes fantasy is not just about wizards.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Had Enough
Thinking
Wizards
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Don't be smart. Smart is only a polished version of dumb. Try intelligence. It will surely see you through.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Dumb
Smart
Trying
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People couldn't become truly holy, he said, unless they also had the opportunity to be definitively wicked.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Opportunity
People
Temptation
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You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a meaningful look.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Giving
Looks
Mean
Meaningful
Tortoise
Trample
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Because some stories end, but old stories go on, and you gotta dance to the music if you want to stay ahead
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Goes On
Stories
Want
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Moist was sure doctors keep skeletons around to cow patients. Nyer, nyer, we know what you look underneath.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Doctors
Looks
Skeletons
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Aziraphale. The Enemy, of course. But an enemy for six thousand years now, which made him a sort of friend.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Enemy
Six
Years
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Granny knew all about bad fortune-telling. It was harder than the real thing. You needed a good imagination.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Imagination
Fortune Telling
Real
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Sometimes I feel that the world is made up of sensible people who know the plot and bloody idiots who don't.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
People
Plot
World
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Assassins did have a certain code, after all. It was dishonorable to kill someone if you weren't being paid.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Assassins
Certain
Code
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He was, he would be the first to admit, a coward, an incompetent, and not even very good at being a failure.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Coward
Firsts
Would Be
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You can think and you can fight, but the world's always movin', and if you wanna stay ahead you gotta dance.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Fighting
Rodents
Thinking
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I should have learned this, she thought. I wanted to learn fire, and pain, but I should have learned people.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Fire
Pain
Should Have
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It was the living who ignored the strange and wonderful, because life was too full of the boring and mundane.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Ignored
Strange
Wonderful
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Truthfully, without over-egging it, as I often do, the library and journalism, those things made me who I am.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Journalism
Library
Who I Am
Truthfully
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Just to keep bad dreams at bay, she took a swig out of a bottle that smelled of apples and happy brain-death.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Dream
Apples
Brain
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Remember - that which does not kill us can only make us stronger. And that which does kill us leaves us dead!
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Doe
Remember
Stronger
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It is said that the Devil has all the best tunes. This is broadly true. But Heaven has the best choreographers
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Devil
Heaven
Tunes
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The Captain of the Watch says if you're still in the City by sunrise he will personally have you buried alive.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Cities
Sunrise
Watches
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Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Funny
Life
Fire
Intelligent
Warm
Build
Life Man Day
Fire Man Day
Man
Life Fire Man
He
Day
Set
Rest
His
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Journalism makes you think fast. You have to speak to people in all walks of life. Especially local journalism.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Journalism
Make You Think
People
Thinking
Walks
Fast
Local
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It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's called living.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Funny
Life
Eye
Facts
Said
Life Your Die
Die
Life Eyes Your
Living
True
Before
Often
Eyes
In Fact
Passes
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I don't see what's so triffic about creating people as people and then gettin' upset 'cos they act like people.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Creating
People
Upset
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I'm up to my neck in the real world, every day. Just you try doing your VAT return with a head full of goblins.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Imagination
Real
Trying
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And all those exclamation marks, you notice? Five? A sure sign of someone who wears his underpants on his head.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Discworld
Exclamation Marks
Underpants
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Seeing, contrary to popular wisdom, isn't believing. It's where belief stops, because it isn't needed any more.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Belief
Believe
Needed
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Were you proposing to shoot these people in cold blood, sergeant?" "Nossir. Just a warning shot inna head, sir.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Blood
People
Warning
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OH, THERE HAS TO BE SOMETHING IN THE STOCKING THAT MAKES A NOISE, said Death. OTHERWISE, WHAT IS 4:30 A.M. FOR?
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Noise
Said
Stockings
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You were the kind of kid who couldn't see the difference between throwing rocks at a cat and setting it on fire.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Kids
Cat
Fire
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Or -- and this she knew was a far more accurate way of looking at it -- the book was true and reality was lying.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Book
Lying
Reality
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It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Being Bad
Enough
Many Friends
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No more words. We know them all, all the words that should not be said. But you have made my world more perfect.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Goodbye
Perfect
World
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The wages of sin is death but so is the salary of virtue, and at least the evil get to go home early on Fridays.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Home
Evil
Friday
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That's one form of magic, of course." "What, just knowing things?" "Knowing things that other people don't know.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Knowing
Magic
People
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...it is well known that a vital ingredient of success is not knowing that what you're attempting can't be done.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Done
Ingredients
Knowing
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I don't believe in the war god of the Israelites. He's a bogeyman. Jesus preached the golden rule, by and large.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Jesus
War
Golden
Golden Rule
Large
Preached
Rule
The Golden Rule
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Lots of ingenuity gets you through times with no money better than money gets you through times of no ingenuity.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Ingenuity
No Money
Rough Times
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The sun is simple. A sword is simple. A storm is simple. Behind everything simple is a huge tail of complicated.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Simple
Storm
Tails
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He felt as if he had been shipwrecked on the Titanic, but in the nick of time had been rescued. By the Lusitania
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Felt
Ifs
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If you had enough money, you could hardly commit crimes at all. You just perpetrated amusing little peccadilloes.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Crime
Had Enough
Littles
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People like that don't need a reason apart from "because I can". They have a nightmare and try to make it happen.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Needs
People
Trying
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You had to hand it to the Patrician, he admitted grudgingly. If you didn't, he sent men to come and take it away.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Men
Hands
Vetinari
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I was just a kid then. But I won't forget. Nor will others. There's lots of people with reason to hate the Church.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Kids
Church
Hate
People
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Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can.
Terry Pratchett
/
Author
Life
Exercise
Mind
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