Regret is just perfectionism plus time.

I'm a believer in trusting the director.

I do not have very much office experience.

Battered Women: sounds delicious. Doesn’t make it right.

Travel is impossible, but daydreaming about travel is easy.

If I could go to dinner with one person, alive or dead, I think I would choose alive.

Nobody remembers how long anything takes; they only remember how good it was in the end.

There's not many good comedies to watch - you know, comedies that make you glad you watched them.

Good comics gravitate to each other; you know who's your type of person by watching them onstage, hopefully.

If you love something, let it go. If you don't love something, definitely let it go. Basically, just drop everything, who cares.

I think it's better to not know certain things. It gives the world an extra bit of mystery, which is important to us as human beings.

Perfect. Why was this so hard to find?”The other type of perfect is the type you never could have expected and then could never replicate.

If people are well paid for reality television and cotton candy and dunking a basketball, why can't they be well paid for changing young minds?

Mindy Kaling gets her own line in the acknowledgments, as previously negotiated by her representatives. Thanks, Mindy. I love you and you're the best.

I think I am very proud of being associated with quality things. So if I were massively famous for doing massively beloved things, yeah, that sounds great.

'The Office' is less a comedy than so many other 'comedies' that have been on the air. It's really about the balance between what is real and what is comic.

'The Office' is less a comedy than so many other "comedies" that have been on the air. It's really about the balance between what is real and what is comic.

I have blue eyes, and before I knew anything about fashion - I'm talking about the second grade - I learned I would get a compliment if I wore a blue shirt.

The most exciting thing I aspire to do is to write something new that I know is going to work, or perform something that I know is going to make people laugh.

It's not always enough to be brave, I realized years later. You have to be brave and contribute something positive, too. Brave on its own is just a party trick.

I wanted to be a writer first, and I struck out in the world to be a writer first, and then found stand-up as a more creative outlet, as a 3D way to be creative.

I like jeans, but I think in 100 years it's going to be crazy when we look back at the fact that everyone, every day for about 60 years straight, wore stiff blue pants as their default. Why?

I remember my mum coming into my bedroom when I was lying awake one night, and she asked what I was thinking of... And I was telling her about the inventions I would invent, and she said, 'Can't you ever just think stupid thoughts?'

Different people have different styles, but there is an opportunity as a director to be a writer in every moment, with every visual cue and every piece of production design. Everything is a decision, and everything can be obsessed over.

If a work alienates a reader, should that be counted against it? I respect people that love 'Ulysses,' for example, but I'm on the other side of the argument. 'Ulysses' would be better if it seduced me. But I probably have the minority point of view.

I think a lot of writers spend years just getting up the courage to write because it seems like such a fantasy of a profession. My dad saved me all that time by making me think, 'Oh, anyone can be a writer. It's like being a firefighter or a lawyer.'

I don't actually feel multi-talented. I just feel that I'm in this business where we give ourselves 100 titles and gold statues. It's like, lawyers aren't like, 'You're incredible! You're a professional arguer in front of the judge! You're great at paperwork!' No, you just get credit for one job.

I feel like there's a voice in my head, always, telling me every idea is brilliant, and another telling me every idea is the worst. And they argue in my head until somebody wins, until I solicit an audience to be, like, 'Will you help me figure this out? Is this the best or the worst idea?' And they tell me!

It feels as though a very disproportionate number of main characters are writers, because that's what the writer knows. Fair enough. But nothing bothers me more in a movie than an actor playing a writer, and you just know he's not a writer. Writers recognize other writers. Ethan Hawke is too hot to be a writer.

I have one really nice watch. It's a white-face, stainless-steel Rolex Daytona. I wear it a lot. I got that in the middle of 'The Office.' All the guys in the writers' room were like, 'Let's all get a nice watch.' We were too busy to upgrade our lives in a big way, but we thought this was a nice symbolic gesture.

There's always going to be one more thing. Because that's what infinite feels like. And the difference between love and everything else is that it's infinite, it's built out of something infinite, or it feels like it is, anyway, which is the same thing to us. You think a million billion more things will come your way, a million billion more versions of everything. But no, everything that actually causes that infinite feeling, the circumstances of every infinite feeling, is so, so finite.

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