Our nannas are losers.

Moving makes you feel all alone inside.

A little glitter can turn your whole day around.

I find the term perfect child to be an oxymoron.

Sometimes grown ups don't act their right old age

I find the term 'perfect child' to be an oxymoron.

I don't even like clowns. Clowns are not normal people.

I'm not actually sure I'm grown-up enough for grown-up books.

Society just has a way of inhibiting you, which is good and bad.

Of all the novels I've written, my favorite is 'Mick Harte Was Here'.

A stick or a stone only stings for a minute. A name seems to hurt forever.

I've stopped reading about my books on the Internet because it's too hurtful.

Can't we be friends?' I hate your guts, Frankovitch' Can't our guts be friends?

Even though sometimes you can control your anger, you can't control your sadness.

For 20 years I've gotten to laugh my way through my work. For me, that's a dream job.

There are many reluctant young readers who haven't yet found books that make them laugh.

And sometimes when you're very mixed-up inside, you do things you know you shouldn't do.

Junie B. Jones. The B stands for Beatrice. Except, I don't like Beatrice. I just like B and that's all.

My own pregnancies were all about me, me, me. My aches, my pains, my swollen feet, and my body that looked like the Michelin Man.

The upside to grief is it takes away your appetite. When people say you look good they really mean it. Nature's thoughtful that way.

My criteria for what makes a book an official 'favorite,' is based almost entirely on how desperately I don't want the story to end.

I don't really believe in pretending to be happy when you're not. Mostly I believe that you should burden your friends with your problems.

My senior year of high school, I was voted Wittiest. So, several years later, I decided to try my hand at writing humor to see if I could be witty enough to make some money.

My senior year of high school, I was voted 'Wittiest.' So, several years later, I decided to try my hand at writing humor to see if I could be witty enough to make some money.

I like to think that Junie B. looks at the world - and this isn't a negative comment on her - from the lowest common denominator. It's not all gray to her; it's all black and white.

I was a good kid, but I was just very chatty. Teachers were rarely entertained, but occasionally a child was, which was enough for me. Everything was so urgent. I needed to say it immediately.

I'm so lazy as far as liking to get up, go to the office in my pajamas, get dressed about noon. And I hate flying. So I have this really laid-back, good lifestyle, and it's hard to nudge me out of it.

I wasn't that over-the-top, but I got sent to the principal in first grade for talking. And my father was for a long time the president of the Board of Education. That was always a hard note to bring home.

Ever since I began writing my Junie B. Jones series, people have been assuming that the character is based on me when I was a little girl. The fact is, though, that Junie B. and I have very little in common.

I happen to think that a book is of extraordinary value if it gives the reader nothing more than a smile or two. It's perfectly okay to take a book, read it, have a good time, giggle and laugh - and turn off the TV. I love that.

Sometimes I think he’s the kind of friend that grownups call a ‘fair-weather friend.’ That means when everything’s going smoothly, he’s the best friend a guy could want. But as soon as something goes wrong…(he) sort of turns on you.

I find that when I'm struggling to think of how a six-year-old would feel about something, I just have to go right down to the common denominator, find the simplest way that you can look at an object or a problem, and not muck it up with all of the stuff that adults do and over-analyze.

When you’re in between dreams, you get to lean back and relax and stop trying so hard. Trying to be somebody, I mean. It’s not as exciting as being a television star, but it’s not that bad, either. You just have to learn to be satisfied with the way you are for a while. Not Forever. Just until you’re finished resting.

There are those who believe that the value of a children's book can be measured only in terms of the moral lessons it tries to impose or the perfect role models it offers. Personally, I happen to think that a book is of extraordinary value if it gives the reader nothing more than a smile or two. In fact, I happen to think that's huge.

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