Joan Rivers Quotes - Page 2

Quote of the Day Picture Quotes Top 100 Inspirational Quotes Top 100 Love Quotes Top 100 Happiness Quotes

W. Edwards Deming Nelson Mandela Ernest Hemingway Kobe Bryant Bob Marley John F. Kennedy Dwight D. Eisenhower Sun Tzu Marcus Aurelius Dolly Parton

Faith Movies Veterans Day Wedding I Miss You 4th Of July Happiness Zoos Mother's Day Quirky

I'm a New York girl. I come out of New York theater.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
New York
Theater
York
Copy Quote
Never admit that your back goes out more than you do
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny Golf
Golf
Great Golf
Copy Quote
The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Beauty
Found
Fugitive
Makeup
Ideal
Copy Quote
Girls just want to have fun. Well, so do old ladies!
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Girl
Fun
Want
Copy Quote
I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Success
Inspiration
Memorable
Thinking
Everyone
Else
Everyone Else
Saying
Succeeded
Copy Quote
I was born in 1962, and the room next to me was 1963.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Born
Next
Rooms
Copy Quote
I'm in nobody's circle, I've always been an outsider.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Circles
Hillarious
Outsiders
Nobody
Been
Circle
Outsider
Copy Quote
I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Classical Music
Thinking
Copy Quote
Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Food
Fats
Seconds
Fat
Favorite
Elizabeth
Her
Taylor
Copy Quote
My body is a temple, and my temple needs redecorating.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Body
Needs
Temples
Copy Quote
I was smart enough to go through any door that opened.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Inspiring
Enough
Smart
Strong Women
Go
Any
Through
Door
Opened
Copy Quote
Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Calm
Enjoy
Thought Provoking
Copy Quote
Put me up against Sarah Silverman and I could take her.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Sarah
Copy Quote
I got a waterbed, but my husband stocked it with trout.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny
Humor
Husband
Copy Quote
Comedy - and I say this with humility - comedy needs me.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Humility
Memorable
Needs
Copy Quote
The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny
Inspirational
Running
Fitness
First Time
Time See First Time
First
Consider
See
Smiling
Copy Quote
We all mourn in our own way. I mourn with a great steak.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Age
Aging
Way
Copy Quote
Omaha is a little like Newark, without Newark's glamour.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Home
Travel
Littles
Copy Quote
I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Aging
Mind
Want
Copy Quote
I have no methods; all I do is accept people as they are.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Accept
Methods
Copy Quote
All my friends are dying. That's why I always wear black.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Black
Dying
My Friends
All My Friends
Copy Quote
Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Aspirin
Hillarious
Mayonnaise
Copy Quote
On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Diets
Laughing
White
Copy Quote
My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Birth
Birth Control
Funny Love
Funny Relationship
Love You
Leave
Lights
Copy Quote
I have no methods. All I do is accept people as they are.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Accepting
Approval
People
Copy Quote
If you're not a wreck in this business, you're not around.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Ifs
Wrecks
Copy Quote
keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Age
Moving
Target
Copy Quote
I get butterflies before I go out to say hello at a party.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Hello
Party
Butterflies
Copy Quote
If I found Yoko Ono floating in my pool, I'd punish my dog.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Dog
Floating
Insult
Copy Quote
I hate thin people; 'Oh, does the tampon make me look fat?'
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Hate
Memorable
People
Copy Quote
Forty for you, sixty for me. And equal partners we will be.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny
Business
Equal
Forty
Partners
Sixty
Copy Quote
I now consider it a good day when I don't step on my boobs.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny
Humorous
Memorable
Copy Quote
Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Dark
Optimism
Think Positive
Copy Quote
My boobs are so low I had to put curb feelers on my nipples!
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Feeler
Lows
Nipples
Copy Quote
If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny
God
Women
Humorous
Wanted
Witty
Bend
He
Diamonds
Floor
Over
Put
Copy Quote
Life is a movie, and you're the star. Give it a happy ending.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Giving
Happy Endings
Stars
Copy Quote
I have a million dollar figure ... but it's all loose change.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Dollars
Figures
Loose Change
Copy Quote
Everyone takes fashion so seriously! It's fashion - enjoy it!
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Enjoy
Fashion
Copy Quote
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Women
Memorable
Stomach
Thighs
Covers
Flabby
Fortunately
Copy Quote
I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Life
Thinking
Particularly
Perfectly
Copy Quote
My body is dropping so fast, my gynecologist wears a hard hat.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Body
Gynecologists
Hats
Copy Quote
I'll lie still for a lot of things - but sex isn't one of them.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Funny
Lying
Sex
Copy Quote
Boy George is all England needs. Another queen who can't dress.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Queens
Boys
Dresses
Needs
Copy Quote
If you don't want gays in the military, make the uniforms ugly.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Gay
Military
Ugly
Copy Quote
It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Love
Life
Forgotten
Sex
Sexy
Ties
Copy Quote
I will only praise someone who can't take anything away from me.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Praise
Me Will Anything
Copy Quote
I love Israel for its blue and white flag as it matches my legs.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Blue
Israel
Love Is
Copy Quote
I have so little sex appeal that my gynecologist calls me "sir."
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Beauty
Littles
Sex
Copy Quote
Life does not measure up to performing... Performing is perfect.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
Performing
Measure
Copy Quote
Boy George is all England needs - another queen who can't dress.
Joan Rivers / Television Personality
England
Needs
Boy
George
Queen
Copy Quote

‹ Prev
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
Next ›

Stay Connected

facebook
twitter
pinterest
instragram

App & Tools

Get Daily Quotes of QuoteForever App Make Your Picture Quotes, Download and Share

Related Television Personality Authors

Kim Kardashian
Television Personality
Tuesday, Oct 21, 1980
Ziya Tong
Television Personality
Zak Bagans
Television Personality
Tuesday, Apr 05, 1977
Yolanda Foster
Television Personality
Saturday, Jan 11, 1964
Willie Geist
Television Personality
Saturday, May 03, 1975
Whitney Port
Television Personality
Monday, Mar 04, 1985
Vinny Guadagnino
Television Personality
Wednesday, Nov 11, 1987
Vanna White
Television Personality
Monday, Feb 18, 1957
Vanessa Lachey
Television Personality
Sunday, Nov 09, 1980
Tyra Banks
Television Personality
Tuesday, Dec 04, 1973
Tom Snyder
Television Personality
Tuesday, May 12, 1936
Sunday, Jul 29, 2007
Tom Bergeron
Television Personality
Friday, May 06, 1955
Teresa Giudice
Television Personality
Thursday, May 18, 1972
Tanika Ray
Television Personality
Tuesday, Jan 25, 1972
Steve Wilkos
Television Personality
Monday, Mar 09, 1964

View All Television Personality Quotes

Top Authors

Friedrich Nietzsche
Philologist
Tuesday, Oct 15, 1844
Saturday, Aug 25, 1900
Aristotle
Philosopher
Thursday, Jan 01, 1970
Thursday, Jan 01, 1970
John Locke
Philosopher
Sunday, Aug 29, 1632
Tuesday, Oct 28, 1704
Paulo Coelho
Lyricist
Sunday, Aug 24, 1947
Socrates
Philosopher
Thursday, Jan 01, 1970
Thursday, Jan 01, 1970
Abraham Lincoln
16Th U.S. President
Sunday, Feb 12, 1809
Saturday, Apr 15, 1865
Walt Disney
Animator
Thursday, Dec 05, 1901
Thursday, Dec 15, 1966
Kobe Bryant
Basketball Player
Wednesday, Aug 23, 1978
Helen Keller
Author
Sunday, Jun 27, 1880
Saturday, Jun 01, 1968
Niccolo Machiavelli
Historian
Monday, May 03, 1469
Tuesday, Jun 21, 1527
Dalai Lama
Saturday, Jul 06, 1935
Heraclitus
Philosopher
Thursday, Jan 01, 1970
Thursday, Jan 01, 1970
George Carlin
Comedian
Wednesday, May 12, 1937
Sunday, Jun 22, 2008
Ernest Hemingway
Author
Friday, Jul 21, 1899
Sunday, Jul 02, 1961
Dolly Parton
Singer-Songwriter
Saturday, Jan 19, 1946

View All Authors

Share This Page

Discover a vast collection of quotes covering a range of topics, occasions, events, and written by a variety of authors at QuoteForever. Keep updated by following us on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram, where we regularly share the top quotes. Inspire personal growth, gain motivation, and share with loved ones.

Top 100 Quotes

Top 100 Motivational Quotes
Top 100 Life Quotes
Top 100 Love Quotes
Top 100 Inspirational Quotes
Top 100 Funny Quotes
Top 100 Happiness Quotes
Top 100 Girl Quotes

Top 100 Positive Quotes
Top 100 Attitude Quotes
Top 100 Wisdom Quotes
Top 100 Smile Quotes
Top 100 Leadership Quotes
Top 100 Success Quotes
Top 100 Friendship Quotes
Top 100 Thinking Quotes

Home
About Us
Privacy policy
Terms
Contact

Stay Connected

App & Tools

Related Television Personality Authors

Popular Topic Tags

Top Authors

Share This Page