Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Hispanics still have the highest rate amongst teens with babies so at least the future housekeeping is secure.
I wish it was that easy to get turned on for me - at this point, I need a bottle of Belevere and a fighterjet.
I don't mean to be a racist but if you're going to get raped by a Japanese guy, it's not going to hurt at all.
I would never get married while my father is still alive because I wouldn't want him to walk me down the aisle.
Reality TV's pretty tricky for me. I don't really watch anything like that, because I think it's brain-sucking.
The whole point of remaining on cable is to remain true to who I am. That's a bad, bad girl that got a big job.
I was broke from 19 to 26, borrowing money from my parents or my brothers or sisters every week to pay the bills.
Maybe they should name more drugs cute things. I don't do meth, but maybe if they called meth 'Stefanie' I would!
I couldn't go any higher with three Michelin stars. I mastered my craft. I'm still learning and picking up ideas.
Don't think about anything for too long. Even if it's off-the-wall, go for it. You'll have a lot more fun in life.
Can you imagine getting a gun for a secret Santa? That is especially not a good idea if you work in a post office.
If diamonds are a girl's best friend, I wonder if blood diamonds are a girl's best friend 5 days out of the month?
Most republicans are against contraception because they don't care about it. You can't get pregnant anally anyway.
It’s true what they say about patience being a virtue; it just happens to be a virtue that I choose not to pursue.
There's a reason you never see anyone's house with a Beware of Cat sign. Because they're not even worth mentioning.
I hate that people assume guys are the only ones to want sex. Girls want sex, too, and that shouldn't be a problem.
Adults end up shading things and shading the truth, and you end up lying and telling people what they want to hear.
It's unfiltered conversation and I love it. I also like to argue with children, so it's the perfect platform for me.
I understand that if you're a kid in Indonesia, you need to smoke because you just got off work at the Nike factory.
There's a McDonalds in Hong Kong & they're offering couples the opportunity to get married. You can have a McWedding.
Kiefer Sutherland has agreed to serve 48 days in jail for his DUI convictions. That's 245 months in Jack Bauer years.
Paula Abdul's really impatient to start a family. She says if she has to wait much longer she's going to go crazy-er.
If you talk about Lindsay Lohan for four or five days a week, you really can't bear to talk about her on the weekends.
You don't mess with janitors, first of all, they have like 40 keys, and 1 is to a closet you don't want to be inside of.
It's hard to tell these days what gender people are. You don't know if they're gay, if they're straight, or Bruce Jenner.
The next step for me is not 'The Tonight Show.' That's a job for Jimmy Fallon. I'm way too divisive for a show like that.
Getting rewarded for being pregnant when you're a teenager? Are you serious? I mean, that makes me want to kill somebody.
There was never a moment when I was like, 'I'm going to enter the public conversation on the importance of female nudity.'
I think it's important to be involved with charities that don't necessarily reflect what you're dealing with in your life.
It's a pleasure to play my sister because everything I've accused her of my whole life, I can now re-enact before her eyes.
I think it's important to be authentic to who you are, and if you're inauthentic at all, people smell that from a mile away.
If you do talk dirty, make sure that you enunciate because there's nothing more embarrassing than having to repeat yourself.
People tend to call me names that I can't repeat on basic cable. I will give you a hint. They rhyme with itch, hunt, & bore.
Have you ever been to an AA meeting? No wonder these people are alcoholics - I've never needed a drink more badly in my life.
My message is strong and my belief is strong, in the fact that we can still be provocative and have fun and just get informed.
It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to be.
Who's the president on the $100 bill? I don't know. I don't need to know because I don't use cash. I only use travelers checks.
It's a dream come true to have someone else portray me. Because I've been living this life for a long time, and I'm over myself.
Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.
Once I turned 40, my whole life changed in the most mature - not boring way but much cooler way. I feel much more like an adult.
I'm not trying to be a role model to kids, because I don't have any children, but I do think everyone should have a free spirit.
The challenge is to keep it fresh. If you're talking about Britney Spears over and over, it's very hard to keep that interesting.
I have a question. Do you guys think it's OK to drink while you're pregnant if you're planning on giving the baby up for adoption?
As a woman, we should all stop talking about it and just acknowledge what's happened and act like we own the space, because we do.
I think if you're gonna do something as silly and lighthearted as entertainment, then why not be interesting when you're doing it?
You should always speak your mind, and be bold, and be obnoxious, and do whatever you want and don’t let anybody tell you to stop it.
Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another person.
I like to laugh. It's kind of escapism. I like to make people laugh. And I kind of like people just to have to not think about anything
You can act, or you can't. I'm sure a lot of people who are serious about acting would disagree, but I'm not really worried about them.
You either become like your parents or you become the opposite of your parents. And I like to think that I'm the opposite of my parents.