I was a huge fan of Tom Snyder.

I assumed I'd never be divorced.

I'd love to interview Mark Cuban!

Social media is making us more anti-social.

You can't let regret stifle your creativity.

Everyone knows that senior citizens are stupid

You might remember me from Eminem's rap lyrics.

I knew at an early age that I wanted to pursue comedy.

It would be a dream to perform at Radio City Music Hall.

I've always liked outrageous comedy and pushing the envelope.

I like to do something that gets a real reaction from people.

If something becomes mean-spirited and hurtful, it's not funny.

It was just a very short period of time that I had a brief marriage.

I don't really consider myself an actor, and I don't know if I'm a comedian.

I considered myself a professional comedian because the club would pay me $20.

I don't watch a whole lot of television, to be honest, but I do miss music videos.

I think somebody getting repulsed is a positive reaction. Any reaction is positive.

I've always really enjoyed sounds and alliteration and funny words and funny melodies.

If an audience is loud and in a party mode, that's an audience that can absorb comedy.

I've always found success in sort of separating myself from the pack mentality things.

Whenever I do something I tend to focus on it and spend all of my time and energy on it.

All comedy is really talking about social issues and things that are affecting our lives.

Whenever I do something, I tend to focus on it and spend all of my time and energy on it.

I like keeping people guessing. I like to have fun with them wondering if I'm sane or not.

Not many people get that chance to have multiple studios wanting you to make a movie with them.

I really missed what I'd done on Rogers Cable, which was shooting and editing all my own stuff.

We all borrow and steal and copy from each other, and that's the way I think people get inspired.

I don't really like to just sit down at a computer and write, because that tends to be a little forced.

I lived in my parents' basement until the age of 25 while I was trying to get my TV show off the ground.

Technology can't eliminate the need for people going to want to go out and see theater and standup comedy.

I want people to know that I'm not just this crazy person flailing around. A lot of thought goes into what I do.

It's nice to go skating in a parking lot and hang out with people who aren't talking about their next movie role.

I'll be straight with you. It's not easy to sell tickets in Vegas. I'm up against Celine Dion and Britney Spears.

There is something romantic about the world being a diverse place, where every place has a Starbucks and Denny's.

I'm always making micro-adjustments onstage, listening to the audience, and what a crowd is like can be infectious.

I grew up practically getting into this business because of David Letterman. I wanted to do comedy-based interviews.

I used to love 'The Late Late Show.' It was nice to be able to be up late at night and see an extended conversation.

I try to make a point in my life to leave the cell phone in the car sometimes, to try to unplug as much as possible.

I essentially have always directed everything on my TV show without using that title; I edited and wrote all my stuff.

Drew is a wonderful woman. I love her very much. I wish our marriage could have worked out. I wish her much happiness.

I'm no more a lawbreaker than they are , and if they were lawbreakers for keeping God's commandments, they're my example.

Performing on stage is addictive. The adrenaline rush is exhilarating. When I stop touring for a couple weeks, I get antsy.

I think that young people - teenagers, college-age people, anyone under the age of 30 - know when they're being pandered to.

I first met the 'Trailer Park Boys' when they did my web television show, and since then, I've hung out with them a few times.

I've always had fun looking forward, seeing where technology is going, and finding interesting ways of applying that to comedy.

It's hard to have any moral authority over a group of drunken college students when you have never had a beer and never been laid.

Yes, I worked hard to put together an experimental show on a budget of zero. But I was not being exploited by anyone. I was in charge.

The easiest way to win the competition for eyeballs in the digital age is to broadcast bad behavior. People like watching train wrecks.

I always have gotten nervous before every show. But the second I step onstage, it's all gone. It's sort of like an adrenaline rush for me.

I basically went into broadcasting when I was in college because I knew that there was nothing like what I had in my mind on TV at the time.

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