The best advice I got from my dad? Wear a condom.

Put a condom in their hand and hope it don't bust.

I don't wear no condom and I don't plan for no kids.

A condom is a rubber thing shaped like a wiener that hums.

Arnold Schwarzenegger looks like a brown condom full of walnuts.

Fear is the condom of life. It doesn't allow you to enjoy things.

So, did the costume come with a condom, or is that sold separately?

No one has invented a condom for the pen yet. My pen is still sexy.

I'm the type to have a bullet-proof condom and still gotta pull out.

Some men send me condoms and underpants. I'm not sure what they want.

An amicable divorce is like a ventilated condom; it just doesn't work.

You know you're in love when you wear condoms while having sex with other women.

Oh yeah, this was so comforting. Like a porcupine in a condom factory.’ (Danger)

Do you happen to have another Condom? I think I've discovered the cure for headaches.

I think the Americans fished out the same condom but found it had too many holes in it.

If we can just get young people to do the same as their fathers did, that is, wear condoms

There is not only a lack of success for condoms. It's worse than that - they are utter failures.

Condoms will break, but I can assure you that vows of abstinence will break more easily than condoms.

I have no ability to develop muscle tone. I could do situps all day and still look like a condom full of walnuts.

The condom has saved so many lives and it'll save so many more lives. We really owe a great deal to the rubber tree.

You know, we are one nation under a god. Yes, you were right. An angry, crack slinging god who decorates with bullets and spent condoms.

but I don't want to wear a condom because I don't feel anything," and she says calmly... glaring at me,"If you don't use one you're not going to feel anything anyway.

About President Bush's stand against condoms, condoms will not protect you from AIDS . So to just throw a bunch of condoms over to Africa and say, here, we're helping you with AIDS, is just going to further the spread of AIDS over there.

If condoms and potentially microbicides can prevent millions of deaths [from AIDS], they should be made more widely available. I know that there are those who, out of sincere religious conviction, oppose such measures. And with these folks, I must respectfully but unequivocally disagree.

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