Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
The great art of writing is knowing when to stop.
Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.
We should make virtue our master, not our servant.
Advice maybe wrong, but examples prove themselves.
Grown ups don't believe in Santa Claus. They vote.
Ideas pull the trigger, but instinct loads the gun.
In Paris you're always surrounded by French people.
Better make a weak man your enemy than your friend.
Courage is walking naked through a cannibal village
Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.
I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.
Lovers of audio books learn to live with compromise.
It takes all sorts of people to make the underworld.
Peace is the soft and holy shadow that virtue casts.
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.
Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense.
Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius.
Where religion is a trade, morality is a merchandise.
Early genius, like early cabbage, does not head well.
Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.
What man calls civilization always results in deserts.
Man cannot be uplifted; he must be seduced into virtue
Don't put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.
The dog that will follow everbody ain't worth a curse.
Music wasn't made to make us wise, but better natured.
As the economy gets better, everything else gets worse.
I just enjoy lying on the couch and reading a magazine.
Scratch the Christian and you find the pagan - spoiled.
Experience makes more timid men than it does wise ones.
Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does.
If you read somebody's diary, you get what you deserve.
Man cannot be uplifted; he must be seduced into virtue.
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
Wise men have but few confidants, and cunning ones none.
An optimist is a guy that has never had much experience.
I went from having 50 listeners to 50 million listeners.
Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.
It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so.
Ill-nature is a sort of running sore of the disposition.
I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine.
You don't have to be in "Who's Who" to know what's what.
I'm going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow!
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
Happiness is the interval between periods of unhappiness.
Like all of my friends, she's a lousy judge of character.
I like nonfiction books about people with wretched lives.
What other people call dark and despairing, I call funny.
Dead men hear no tales; posthumous fame is an Irish bull.
When the truth is in your way, you are on the wrong road.