Quotes by Stand-Up Comedian of the Authors - Page 2

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Everybody's funny in different ways.

Without my family, I'd be something.

Civil liberties, good. Lawyers, bad.

A unicorn is a donkey from the future

I go through about 140 cities a year.

My comfort zone is press conferences.

I am very into making up my own rules.

It's our flaws who make us who we are.

You can't ride home on a bowl of goat.

My real last name is Galifianakisburg.

I was a street performer for two years.

I'm not what you'd call a Method actor.

I think there's a lesson in everything.

I am going to be the next Ryan Gosling.

People for the most part can smell lies.

I'm Greek. My body produces feta cheese.

Tigers love pepper...they hate cinnamon.

People get really turned off by feminism.

My parents were secular. I am an atheist.

I think a lot of TV insults the audience.

Don't be silly and don't waste your time.

I believe in love the verb, not the noun.

I always wanted to be a popular comedian.

I am a hot-blooded fire and I am fearless.

I know how to be funny to black audiences.

I come from a young, hip-hop, urban world.

Your instinct is your true god. Follow it.

I will blow your face clean off your face!

Humor that is edgy is never squeaky clean.

I suppose I'm always a little bit on edge.

I'm so black, I leave fingerprints on coal.

I'm funny. I'm a comedian. I'm not a clown.

You have such a huge career ... behind you.

I love existing in pre big bang conditions.

I do cagefight commentary in my spare time.

I was a comedy fan when I was a little kid.

God's got his hands in a lot of human pies.

I was good at keeping my mother from crying.

Humor's a weapon if you want to make it one.

I always wanted to write as much as perform.

Don't go back over your life with a red pen.

I just really work hard on myself every day.

Women don't want to win, they want a winner.

My goal is just to become a better comedian.

Comedy is great because there's no overhead.

People in New York love having roof parties.

The white man gets all the best catchphrases!

Omigawa is moving forward like a karate robot

Nobody escapes during Lisa Lampanelli's show.

Exercise is the fountain of youth, I believe.

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