Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
I'm a sarcastic person, and people don't get my humor sometimes
She could carry off anything; and some people said that she did.
His mind is so open - so open that ideas simply pass through it.
Laws are like sausages, it is better not to see them being made.
I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic.
I have friends who are so sarcastic but I never view it as mean.
Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
Death and taxes may be inevitable, but they shouldn't be related.
She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.
What you said hurt me very much. I cried all the way to the bank.
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.
His voice was the most obnoxious squeak I ever was tormented with.
In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you're sorry.
He was so crooked, you could have used his spine for a safety-pin.
I would not want to put him in charge of snake control in Ireland.
You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation.
Where others have hearts, he carries a tumor of rotten principles.
We have so much time and so little to do. Strike that, reverse it.
There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence.
a sarcastic expression, on a beast, is far more sinister than rage.
If you are first you are first. If you are second, you are nothing.
If I didn't kick his ass every day? he wouldn't be worth anything.
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
I am easily satisfied with the very best.
All art is quite useless.
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
The 100% American is 99% idiot.
He makes a July's day short as December.
He's a trellis for varicose veins.
Just because the kid's cute, doesn't mean you're not the father.
I've been in more laps than a napkin.
I think I am, therefore, I am... I think.
What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.
He was born stupid, and greatly increased his birthright.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
A wit with dunces, and a dunce with wits.
He is a fine friend. He stabs you in the front.
He has sat on the fence so long that the iron has entered his soul.
We are never deceived; we deceive ourselves.
She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on with a pitchfork.
It's a match made in heaven...by a retarded angel.
A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.
When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price?
I'm so overexposed, I'm making Paris Hilton look like a recluse.
She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake.