Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.
Why was I born with such contemporaries?
Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?
We've been through so much together, and most of it was your fault.
We have the best government that money can buy.
I can resist everything except temptation.
How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
The finest woman that ever walked the streets.
A good motto to live by: "Always try not to get killed.
Had double chins all the way down to his stomach.
She is a peacock in everything but beauty!
No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.
I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.
How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies.
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
Women are made to be loved, not understood.
I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.
We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
I don't recognize you - I've changed a lot.
He's the kind of man who picks his friends - to pieces.
In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.
Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.
A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.
Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.
Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose.
Men are my hobby, if I ever got married I'd have to give it up.
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.
Friendship is far more tragic than love. It lasts longer.
I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
Everybody who is incapable of learning has taken to teaching.
Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present
However, it is always nice to be expected, and not to arrive.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends.
The English have a miraculous power of turning wine into water.