Late Night Quotes

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This collection holds 82 late night quotes, drawn from writers, leaders, artists and thinkers across the QuoteForever archive. The most quoted voices here are Dane Cook, Brad Stevens and Daniel Boulud.

They are ordered so that each author has a say before anyone repeats, which means the first page gives you the range of the topic rather than one writer's back catalogue.

Use the grid and list views to change how much of each quote you see, follow an author's name to read everything else they said, or open a quote on its own page to copy it, share it, or turn it into a picture quote.

I'm a late-night guy.

I'm not a late-night guy.

I like to go hear jazz late-night up in Harlem.

Good late-night humor can work at any time of the day.

I don't like discotheques, pubs, or late-night parties.

I thought late-night was crowded... the format's repetitive.

I'm more disciplined now. The days of late-night parties are over.

What I really see myself doing is late-night TV. No woman has ever done it.

I'm a late-night person who likes to eat a lot of breakfast stuff at night.

No one was asking me to be on TV. So I made my own late-night TV talk show.

Don't ever rope me in as a late-night talk show host. I don't want to be one.

I grew up watching Cinemax, the late-night Cinemax of the '80s and early '90s.

Maybe I'll write an episode of 'Black-ish' about a guy being fired in late-night.

My big dream is to be a late-night host, but it's like, what does that even mean?

My criticisms of late-night TV blew up some old friendships and sparked some new ones.

I feel my shows are like a late-night talk show that we settle down and do every night.

I'm a notorious late-night texter. I seem to use a lot of lip, heart, and tongue emoji.

Anyone who does stand-up comedy can agree that doing a late-night spot is a dream of theirs.

I do not have to watch late-night television, watch a movie, to find out what combat is like.

I'm a late-night host that doesn't want to be tied down by time or television or even hosting.

If I have one criticism of the other late-night shows, it's that they're almost entirely scripted.

I like American late-night shows, like Trevor Noah, John Oliver and Bill Maher - I've got them all on series link.

I learned a lot from playing those late-night, 1-to-4 A.M. gigs with my band, and playing when no one was listening.

David Letterman is the best late-night talk show host right now, hands down, and has been since he first took the desk.

Italy - I love the late-night culture, hanging around the square at midnight with everyone, catching up and having a drink.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

We thought 'Father Ted' was destined to be obscure late-night Channel 4 fodder and then it works and you don't really know why.

I'm not a late-night person. After 10 P.M., I'm falling asleep. If I'm out at that time, I'll be the one falling asleep at dinner.

So many groups fail because they spend all their time in the clubs. Work pours in and they can't handle it because of late-night drinking.

Nixon started auditing late-night show hosts because they were making jokes about him. Then, every single one of their staff got tax audits.

Vegas needs a really funny, dirty, late-night show, and I'll tell it like it is, I promise you that. And you gotta love the audience I bring in.

When I was a boy, I had a grand, big tape recorder, and I made late-night radio shows with glasses of water and funny voices. I just loved radio plays.

After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead.

Late-night television is like the cereal aisle in the supermarket: too many choices. Also, too many 'different' brands that really aren't different at all.

I thought I was going to do some cult, cool, late-night interviewing thing on BBC2. But everyone kept saying: 'No, Michael, you're teatime, you're not cool.'

I'm on the Internet a lot more than I watch TV and most everybody I know is, and yet if you watch most late-night talk shows, it's as if it doesn't even exist.

I'm an early riser, which is sometimes a drag when I have late-night concerts. But I prefer to wake up early - say, 8:30 - and maybe take a nap during the day.

Politics is pop. Our job as comedians - especially me, as a late-night talk show, which is a broader audience - is to amplify what we think America is thinking.

I'm in the process of brainstorming with my marketing team and all that stuff, trying to come up with a concept for a late-night restaurant for people in Birmingham.

At any kind of Fox function, you'll see 'Mad TV' at the kiddy table in the back, next to the buffet. We're a late-night sketch show, and there is more money in prime time.

You got paid on Friday, go for a late-night poker game, and have no money on Saturday. But the RSC took your rent out of the paycheck, so at least you had a place to sleep.

I've been doing a late-night talk show out here in New Mexico now, 'The After After Party.' We're going to finalize a deal to be in 50 million homes. How blessed can I be, man?

Living in New York is like being at some terrible late-night party. You're tired, you've had a headache since you arrived, but you can't leave because then you'd miss the party.

'Old School' is so breezy it could be a late-night talk show, especially when Craig Kilborn, of 'The Late Late Show,' sidles into camera range as a particularly loathsome competitor to Mitch.

I always was an early-morning or late-night writer. Early morning was my favorite; late night was because you had a deadline. And at four in the morning, you make up some of your most absurd jokes.

I have worked in animation on 'King of the Hill.' I've worked in late-night with 'The Daily Show.' I've worked on single-camera stuff, whether it was a movie or television. I have performed onstage.

The friends I knew who tutored were well paid for work that seemed far less grueling than waitressing or late-night newspaper copy editing or all the other side gigs I attempted in my early twenties.

Any eyes on me - a late-night street sweeper, some dude texting in his parked car, the homeless guy talking to himself - make me feel uncomfortable when I skate. Everyone expects me to do certain things.

I've actually taken meetings about hosting a late-night talk show. I don't know that what we know as a late-night talk show is what I want. But I've been talked into a talk show, but it would be different.

Every president becomes a caricature. The press, partisans, late-night shows, and other arbiters of our culture these days boil down complicated and multi-faceted personalities into one-dimensional punchlines.

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