I think sometimes all the charities are doing is mopping up the blood. It's a shame.

Trying to find my flaws is like trying to find a black person at one of our concerts

I'll take a quiet life, A handshake of carbon monoxide. No alarms and no surprises...

I don't think I have a superiority complex. I have a "you're not Thom Yorke" complex.

You know, it's never easy to understand why I do what I do. For other people, I mean.

If you're bored of the songs, you're bored of the songs. There's not much you can do.

If I could be any animal I would be a pony because then I could have sex with ponies.

OK Computer? More like No Thank You Computers. They killed my father, and I hate them.

Have I told you I have cancer? It's a very special kind of cancer. Cancer of the soul.

When people ask me for an autograph I usually ask for a pen and then stab them with it.

I guess I am narcisstic, but only in the sense that I am brilliant and tortured as well

When even your fans are writing to tell you to get a life, you know you need to listen.

I know I'm 38 but I insist that santa claus exists and he raped my mother when I was 9.

The only real difference between me and chocolate pudding is that I am not a black man.

I hate cars. They are so loud, and ugly, and full of toxic exhaust, like radiohead fans.

If we replaced all of our guns with chicken sandwiches it would end all war immediately.

My uncle used to sit me on his lap and play "ventriloquist", only I wasn't wearing pants.

My father beat me with a curtain rod when I was nine, (That was) the inspiration for Creep

It will be only a matter of time before the music business establishment completely folds.

I was abducted by aliens as a boy. Aliens is the name of a pedophile who lived in my alley.

Like a fat raccoon rummaging through the garbage, that how I eat. Like a f-king fat raccoon.

Someone once asked me how the universe was created, I told him it all began with Pablo Honey

Chicken Little change my life when I was younger. I had no idea chickens could talk *laughs*.

You think I have the responsibilty... I have the responsibility to give the fans a good time!

People sometimes say we take things too seriously, but it's the only way you'll get anywhere.

I'm such a tease And you're such a flirt... Routines and schedules Drug and kill you Kill you.

It's not so much that I'm an atheist so much as the sneaking suspicion that I myself may be god

The society, is, a dishwasher, where all the water, is, dead chipmunk blood. God I'm brilliant.

The joke is that U2's new record only looked like a virus. Enjoy mining bitcoins for me losers.

People are born with certain faces, like my father was born with a face that people want to hit.

The thing I remember most about America is that it's silly. That can be quite a relief at times.

When I was born, my mother didn't know what to name me. Eventually she named me after Thom Yorke.

When I was four I read the story of horton hears a who and I cried. I wanted to eat that elephant.

I have multiple personalities, but, being a fairly uncreative individual, they are all Thom Yorke.

Maybe I'm not the gloaming witches smart, but at least I'm not our stupid liffey hamburger mongrels

While you make pretty speeches I'm being cut to shreds You feed me to the lions A delicate balance.

I'm even taller in person, because photographs shrink you down and steal your soul native american.

I'm glad I escaped the clutches of those evil gnomes... I'm talking, of course, about Puerto Ricans.

I've been reading a book lately. That book is Thom Yorke, and the conclusion is that he's brilliant.

Our merchandised may be over priced, but I think it's reasonable considering I only want more money.

It's the Devil's way now, There is no way out, You can scream and you can shout, It is too late now.

Kid A is about an abortion. An abortion of the soul. *Begins to cry, holds up air quotes* Thom Yorke.

If the media spotlight affects my work or represses what I want to say in the future, then it is bad.

My argument would be that I don't think there is much that's genuinely political art that is good art.

Amnesiac was written to make fun of senior citizens with alzheimers. I hate them and I wish they'd die.

What's the difference between Thom Yorke and a pizza? Pizza's not as cheesy and delicious as Thom Yorke.

The whole point of creating music for me is to give voice to things that aren't normally given voice to.

It turns out I have clinical schizophrenia. The unborn chicken voices were telling me to kill my family.

If you Americans aren't from the stone age then explain to me how your president is a ****ing pterodactyl

Can you imagine a world in which the letter O does not exist? My name would be Thm Yrke. Think about that.

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