This collection holds 1,319 comedian quotes, drawn from writers, leaders, artists and thinkers across the QuoteForever archive. The most quoted voices here are Kelly Slater, J. B. Smoove and Jim Bowen.

They are ordered so that each author has a say before anyone repeats, which means the first page gives you the range of the topic rather than one writer's back catalogue.

Use the grid and list views to change how much of each quote you see, follow an author's name to read everything else they said, or open a quote on its own page to copy it, share it, or turn it into a picture quote.

I wanted to be a comedian.

A lot of comedians are selfish.

Look at what you could have won!

I'm a comedian, not a politician.

I'm not a comedian, I'm an actor.

Architects are the new comedians.

I don't do drama. I'm a comedian.

I always wanted to be a comedian.

Music takes us where words cannot.

I consider Lena Dunham a comedian.

I am not a comedian, I am an actor.

I don't think I was a good comedian.

I know a lot about Jewish comedians.

There are way too many comedians now.

A lot of people think I'm a comedian.

Comedians are the nearest to suicide.

In real life, comedians aren't funny.

I didn't really want to be a comedian.

I love standup comedians. I really do.

I'm trying to be a comedian, you know?

Good comedians are great philosophers.

I didn't really want to be a comedian.

I don't think of myself as a comedian.

I love comedians. They're my community.

I'm not just a pundit - I'm a comedian.

The comedian just wants to get a laugh.

I'm not for everyone. I'm barely for me.

I spent 25 years as a stand-up comedian.

Jews have a tendency to become comedians.

I'm never going to be an improv comedian.

I always wanted to be a popular comedian.

I don't have credibility, I'm a comedian.

I'm a standup comedian, so I need people.

I was an actor before becoming a comedian.

I'm funny. I'm a comedian. I'm not a clown.

I think Flip Wilson is a brillant comedian.

It takes many years to be a great comedian.

I always wanted to be a comedian and actor.

It is better to look good than to feel good.

Hey man! I'm a comedian but I'm not a clown.

In general, comedians are attracted to vice.

They're the darkest people I know, comedians.

It really helps a comedian to be an outsider.

I just think of myself as a comedian, really.

I never thought I was going to be a comedian.

It's good to be funny when you are a comedian.

Seth Meyers is highly overrated as a comedian.

Well, what do you expect? The Comedian is dead.

Thou shalt not steal-only from other comedians.

I've been doing comedies but I'm not a comedian.

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