Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
The really important things are said over cocktails and are never done.
Space is almost infinite. As a matter of fact, we think it is infinite.
He comes back with the script, and it's racist like a 1940's Newspaper.
Impulse buying is not macho. Men rarely call the Home Shopping Network.
I woke with a start. At first I assumed I'd trumped myself awake again.
New York has always been going to hell but somehow it never gets there.
There are worse occupations in this world than feeling a woman's pulse.
If I were Achilles I would put my foot in a f**k off block of concrete!
Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got.
The United States is the greatest law factory the world has ever known.
I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.
We don't devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
I’m actually pale blue: it takes me a week of sunbathing to turn white.
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
My ex-wife is a water sign and I'm an earth sign. Together we made mud.
Our first stop was red square, the heart of Moscow - if Moscow has one.
Pitching is 80% of the game and the other half is hitting and fielding.
Some of the best fiction writers got their start writing airline menus.
The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him.
We grow neither better or worse as we get old, but more like ourselves.
I come from a family of musicians. Even the sewing machine is a Singer.
Most of the gaffes I've made have not been funny - they've been stupid.
Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.
Frentzen is taking, er, reducing that gap between himself and Frentzen.
I do not have a helmet. But this is a wig, so it's a little protective.
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
Statistics show that teen pregnancy drops off significantly after age 2
Stewart has two cars in the top five: Magnusson 5th and Barichello 6th.
Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
A Cannibal is a person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter.
They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.
When you have great players, playing great, well that's great football!
Talking of white supremacist violent types, I was in America, recently.
Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.
It's funny how life works. You end up sometimes back where you started.
The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them.
To see and listen to the wicked is already the beginning of wickedness.
Why pay a dollar for a bookmark? Why not use the dollar for a bookmark?
We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.
The Lybian army is capable of destroying America and breaking its nose.
Of course it's the same old story. Truth usually is the same old story.
May God defend me from my friends: I can defend myself from my enemies.
Some folks can look so busy doing nothing that they seem indispensable.
I work in a "you scratch my back, and I'll stab yours" kind of a place.
Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive.
Wait! Don't applaud my cheapness! I've got other crap I need help with!
More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good.
Many a man is saved from being a thief by finding everything locked up.
I want to go to Egypt and Japan and open orphanages... a chain of them.
I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.