I hate political correctness.

Golf was never a religion to me.

There are no Dave Marrs anymore.

I don't have contempt for Tiger Woods.

I think a great athlete transcends eras.

My real heroes have always been sportswriters.

I'd follow Ben Hogan and Byron Nelson anywhere.

Nobody else is Tiger Woods. Not on this planet.

Every golfer has at least 14 enemies: his clubs.

Valet parking is an essential at any decent club.

There was a time when caddies couldn't wear shorts.

Jack Nicklaus is the greatest winner I've ever seen.

I've worked my whole life and never missed a deadline.

I think newspapers will survive in some form or another.

Only two things can stop Tiger — injury or a bad marriage.

If a caddie can help you, you don't know how to play golf.

My life has been very lucky, but I made some of that luck.

I don't cover golf tournaments anymore - I preside over them.

I like to be entertained, not smothered with 'literary' riddles.

Marty Russo was too good a golfer to be a servant of the people.

Putting is not an art, it's a dreaded evil. No wise man ever said that.

I used to never miss the 'New Yorker' or 'New York.' Now I never bother.

Real golf is the 20 million people who play once a week or once a month.

I probably remember the 1954 Masters more vividly than any of the others.

I just come from a school where you have to win something to be accepted.

A good one iron shot is about as easy to come by as an understanding wife.

The Masters is a sell-out annually, and even the scalpers mind their manners.

There's nothing anyone can do about Tiger Woods but look at his game and swoon.

Presidents are nice people. They're nice, fun-loving people who have great jobs.

There have been so many great moments in golf that you even forget some of them.

Fort Worth is friendly; it's still a Texas town. It's the most Texas city in Texas.

Laughter is the only thing that'll cut trouble down to a size where you can talk to it.

Golf is 90% mental. Once you know how to hold the club, swing it, it's all in the mind.

Baseball would be a better game if more third basemen got hit in the mouth by line drivers.

I actually don't have a single regret, professionally or domestically. I planned it that way.

I haven't looked for a golf ball since mulligans were free, which was a law I passed in 1995.

Historians tell us that a gentleman named John Ball once captured eight British Amateur titles.

CEOs are worried they're going to get fired any minute. They're worried about their portfolios.

Here's all I know about Dubai: It's one of those somewhere-over-there places where they make sand.

I don't suppose anybody's ever enjoyed being who they are more than Arnold's enjoyed being Arnold Palmer.

Kids flew B-17s in daylight bombing raids over Germany in World War II. Kids fought in Korea and Vietnam.

Everybody in the Olympics is paid. Lindsay Vonn is going to make a million dollars whether she skis or not.

The Masters, while it has slowly gained equal importance as a major, isn't really the championship of anything.

Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve.

Until Sammy Baugh - pro football in Texas was a one-paragraph story on the third page of the Monday sports section.

High school golf, college golf and the decade that followed all come back to me now as one big raucous, goofy gangsome.

Title IX came along and changed a lot of things for the better, but nevertheless, it meant that money became more important.

I get 'USA Today,' the 'New York Times,' 'Wall Street Journal' and the 'Star-Telegram' at my doorstep. I can't do without them.

The golf ball has no sense at all, which is why it has to be given stern lectures constantly, especially during the act of putting.

At times, my very own media makes me cringe, and occasionally out loud. By the way, nothing clears the head like an out-loud cringe.

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